Let’s not be friends on Facebook 01/02/10
Earlier this week my good friend Robert Bluey penned a blog post, “You don’t have a friend in me,” in which he effectively argues that when it comes to Facebook, one should focus on having a network which is smaller and more meaningful versus accepting anyone under the sun as your “friend” in order to have a big network.
I thought a lot about Rob’s post, concluded he was spot-on, and decided to make a New Years resolution to go on a Facebook Friend Diet. My goal was to get under 1,500 “friends” by July 4.
Over the holiday, in between trips to the beach, I took to the task of tending my own garden — removing “friends” that I had never met, never communicated with, and had zero interaction with. At first it was a challenge. It’s never easy to “remove” someone who had asked for friendship at one point or another. It was particularly difficult to remove folks I may have known at one point or another or colleagues that I worked with at some time. And Facebook itself makes it technically difficult to remove folks en masse.
But then I started thinking about what Facebook is and why it’s so valuable to me. It’s a place for my friends and family to stay connected with me and where I go to stay connected to them. Facebook, friends, is not about “you.” It is instead about “me.” It is about my network. Unique to Facebook, it is also an important place for “me” to stay connected in new ways to the brands and causes I care about and a new water cooler to share with others that support.
I also thought about how I had been treating my network — as Rob pointed out to me in what felt like a direct media intervention — I had been neglecting and abusing them by simply importing my Tweets rather then creating new and engaging content. To remedy the situation I unlinked my Twitter account and stopped “Twittering” within Facebook. The mediums are different — each with a valuable role but only if used appropriately. Now I’m adding content which is exclusive to Facebook (or at least written specifically for the medium). The reward for doing this is that I’m already seeing interactions on my content increase.
Regarding my New Years Resolution, I crushed it. My network on Facebook is now around 1,300 folks — 98% of which I know personally, have met, and would consider them friends or respected colleagues. There is still work to do but it’s quite refreshing to login and recognize nearly every single person I’ve agreed to receive updates from.
My plan moving forward is to not take any of my “friends” for granted, to continue to tend my garden, and to appropriately use the platform exactly how it was intended. Having an effective online presence in direct media is never easy, there are no short-cuts, and you need to listen to good advice when it presents itself. As always, I am willing to do the work necessary to ensure success and I’m glad I’ve got good friends willing to speak up when I’m not living up to my end of the relationship.
